Obama Wants Olympic Medals Available to All Americans

By Jim Berlin

While U.S. Olympians are entitled to “a small degree of satisfaction” when they medal at the London Games, President Obama told reporters yesterday that athletes must remember: “They didn’t win those medals. Someone else won those medals for them.”

Obama’s remarks, made in the Oval Office after the President’s daily briefing, were in response to a question on whether he was closely following the Olympics.

“I catch what I can between my duties as campaigner-in-chief,” he said, “and I’m always struck by successful jocks who think, well, it must be because I’m just such a great jock. Hey, there are a lot of great jocks out there.

“Or they say, it must be because I worked harder than everybody else,” he added. “Let me tell you something – there are a whole bunch of hardworking jocks out there.

“In every Olympian’s past,” Obama said,  “there were parents and a great coach somewhere in their lives. Without them, and without those roads and bridges and the very clothes they wear – all made by others – they’d be training butt-naked in their basements and backyards instead of some fancy sports facility.

“Let me tell you something,” he chuckled, “swimmers and gymnasts who train naked on swing sets and in their backyard pools are not going to bring home the gold.

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“In fact,” he added, “without clothing they would not even be allowed on the airplanes that carry them to the Olympics.

“There’s a reason athletes at The Games are housed in a place called Olympic Village,” Obama continued. “It’s to remind all of them that it takes a village to raise an athlete, and a village to raise a villager. It even takes a village to build a village – and another village to build that village.”

Obama said he had no problem with Olympic medalists retaining a replica of their awards, “but to be fair the original medals should be housed in a National Olympic Jock Museum.

“That way, all Americans can view, handle and be photographed holding the medals all of them  earned. I especially want a photo with the gold I’ll win in basketball,” he said.

Rahm Emanuel Tries to Pluck Chick-fil-A and 1st Amendment

By Jim Berlin

Before becoming Chicago mayor, Rahm Emanuel was President Obama’s confidant and chief of staff for almost two years – more than enough time to start believing the U.S. Constitution is whatever he says it is.

Enter Dan Cathy, president of the fast-food chain Chick-fil-A (decent chicken, dumb name). Mr. Cathy wants to open a second store in Chicago, but because he recently came out against gay marriage the alderman in whose district the franchise would open said he’d block the permit. (The mayor of Chicago is king; the aldermen are his princes.)

Rahm Emanuel supported his prince: “Chick-fil-A’s values are not Chicago’s values,” he said.

In other words: If you do not share my opinion on gay marriage, you cannot sell your chicken sandwiches in my city.

If common sense tells you that is decidedly un-American, not to mention a slam-dunk violation of the First Amendment’s freedom of speech – another mayor besides Rahm Emanuel disagrees with you.

Boston Mayor Thomas Menino wrote a letter to the Chick-fil-A president that said: “There is no place for discrimination on Boston’s Freedom Trail, and no place for your company alongside it.”

Freedom Trail is a 2.5 mile path in Boston that includes 16 places that were significant in the American Revolution. Places like the Bunker Hill monument

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and the site of the Boston Massacre.

And there’s no place for freedom of speech on Freedom Trail?

What were those Minutemen fighting for who were killed by the Redcoats?

“Don’t fire until you see the whites of their eyes, boys! We fight today for gay marriage!” Or maybe it was, “Give me gay marriage or give me death!” Or, “I regret that I have but one life to give for gay marriage.”

Even the ACLU came out against these two silly mayors, and both had to “clarify” their remarks: Oh no, we wouldn’t really try to prevent Chick-fil-A from selling their chicken sandwiches. Nah, we just meant…aw shucks, something else.

Obama Says Success an Illusion: Thank Others and Uncle Sam

By Jim Berlin

“If you’ve got a business – you didn’t build that. Somebody else made that happen,” the President said. You owe it to some teacher, or the government roads and bridges and infrastructure that let you get to that business you only think you built.

It wasn’t Dorothy’s little dog Toto but the lack of a teleprompter that pulled back the curtain on Mr. Obama in his Roanoke campaign speech. And what we saw behind the curtain was not the Wizard of Hope and Change, not the Great Uniter, but the hard-core liberal philosophy of a man who believes there is no glory in individual achievement, no perks deserved for success.

His message is that each of us owes everything to “the village,” so if we are successful it is only fair that we share that wealth with, well, the whole damn village.

You are not responsible for your success, the Wizard believes, and the liberal corollary is you’re not responsible for being a miserable failure. If you dropped out of high school because hanging out with dope-smoking friends was more fun than homework, blame bad teachers and underfunded schools for not inspiring you.

If you did get a diploma but learning a trade or heading to college seemed too much time and effort, blame parents who failed to

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motivate or your lousy neighborhood or…something else. Anything else.

But not to worry. Those same government-built roads and bridges will get you to the welfare office, just as they get the business owner to the business he did not really build. The business owner who will, who must, share his money with you because it is the fair thing to do.

And if this is a country where there are no exceptional people – only people who owe the government and others for their success – then America is not exceptional either.

No exceptional people – no exceptional country.

Welcome to the man behind the curtain, who is behind the curtain no more.

Obama Needs to Find G-Spot

By Jim Berlin

Both Mitt Romney and Barack Obama are Harvard law grads who attended elite schools from an early age, so each has limited success connecting with the so-called common folk.

Romney is least adept at the game and the least engaged in it; he recognizes the futility of trying to be one of the guys. Bluejeans and an open shirt collar are as far as he ventures across the great divide, and that’s just fine with his supporters.

President Obama works a lot harder at being just like you, whoever you happen to be. And when it’s a blue-collar audience the core of his strategy is the loss of the letter “g” — that esteemed seventh member of the alphabet that makes possible everything from God to golly gee.

Specifically, Obama drops the g from all words that end in “ing.”

And suddenly, the esteemed former editor of the Harvard Law Review is walkin’ and talkin’ and prayin’ and workin’ hard for all the hard-workin’ folks livin’ in this land.

And the faithful hear these strings of earthy contractions delivered with the fervor and flair of a traveling evangelist, and they believe, brother, they believe. This man is one of us. This here is a politician who ain’t lyin’!

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Frankly, I get downright embarrassed for the President of the United States when he stoops to conquer by going all cornpone and talking like he thinks we talk. I don’t want a President who bows to anyone, but he certainly needs to doff his cap to the King’s English. All the time.

We know very well Mr. Obama doesn’t speak to his family like that in the White House. He doesn’t even speak to his dog “Bo” like that:

“Hey, Bo, let’s you’n me go a walkin’.” It does not happen.

Mr. President, find the letter “g” and don’t ever let go of it again.