Obama Skipped Paris Rally
To Watch NFL Playoff Games

 By Jim Berlin

Our president was a glaring no-show when 40 other world leaders and a million French marched in an anti-terrorism rally Sunday in Paris, but Obama had his reasons:

“One of the perks of ruling America,” the president told a reporter, “is I don’t have to waste my Sundays in church or marching with a bunch of cheese-eaters in Paris when the NFL playoffs are going on.

“I mean, come on!” he laughed. “Would you rather watch the Packers play the Cowboys or walk down a street with Angela Merkel on one arm and Benjamin Netanyahu on the other?”

When it was pointed out he could have represented America at the rally, then viewed the NFL games on Air Force One while flying home, Mr. Obama scoffed:

“Two reasons why not,” he said. “First, satellite TV reception over the Atlantic is dicey at best – too much snow in the pictures.”

And the second reason?

“The White House chef in charge of treats while I watch football makes the best damn popcorn in the country, bar none. I’m not going to eat microwave Jiffy Pop in an airplane just to go to France and kick a

 bunch of alleged Muslim terrorists when they’re feeling down.”

Given that the NFL playoff games were airing Sunday, Obama said the French “should have had the courtesy” to schedule the rally later in the week.

“Do it on a Tuesday or Wednesday and I might have attended,” the president said. “Those cheese-eaters just don’t think things through like they should.”